Monster. I hear the word thrown around all the time. Nobody seems to recognize that the monster in me is the monster in you.
I work as a spiritual advisor to guys that are about to be executed. In late September, I accompanied my eighth prisoner to his death. That’s right, I stand in the execution chamber as the state murders someone I’ve grown to care about.
Of course, most of the time the general consensus from the public is that my guy is a monster. And yet, every time I’ve walked out of the execution chamber thinking that the monster is me. How could I be involved in an execution? While I don’t actively participate in the killing, I do calm or emotionally and spiritually hold down the condemned while the state executes them.
When people hear me talk like this, they’re quick to reassure me that my job is to be a light in the darkness. But it doesn’t work. The darkness seems too dense to let any light through.
Monster. I think we call people monsters so that we don’t have to deal with the monster within. I’m convinced that executions are a way of attempting to excise – and failing to excise – what we fear the most: the evils that fester within us all. We think we can heal the self by killing the other. Why can’t we recognize that the society that we’ve created is capable of producing monsters? Why can’t we see that our behaviors are not that far removed from that which we abhor (for example, our funding of bombs and missiles to help kill 40,000 in Gaza)? Maybe we wouldn’t throw the word “monster” around so much if we were convicted of our role in their creation and perpetuation.
Monster.
There are few people who have come to embody the word in modern culture more than Jim Jones. Typically, the narrative rests on the idea that Jones is solely responsible for the murder of close to a thousand people. While I certainly don’t minimize his actions, I do think it’s important to consider that blame for such an incident might be wider than just him. Repeatedly, Jones talked about the failures of society as a catalyst for the growth of Peoples Temple and later, the desire to flee to Guyana. Most would stop there. But what if the lack of food and healthcare, the crushing weight of racism, the suffocating loneliness of modernity and the apocalyptic realities of nuclear war were just as much – or maybe even more – to blame for the catastrophe/s of Jonestown than Jones is? Even if most people don’t agree with me, I believe Jones would have achieved no traction at all if not for the sins of wider society. But I ask, where is our accountability in the midst of such conjecture? I’ve experienced it in the execution chamber. I’ve experienced it in studies of Jonestown. We are too ignorant to realize that the monster of Guyana is the monster in us.
Monster. What if Jim Jones had somehow survived? Maybe he tried to run into the jungle? Maybe he was too intoxicated to kill himself? Maybe one of the loves of his life stopped him from going all the way? Imagine. Jones is awakened by local authorities, handcuffed and charged with the murder of nearly a thousand people. Once extradited, Jones is put on trial and eventually given the death penalty. At this point, most would cheer. The “monster” is getting what he deserves right?
The execution approaches. This is where I step in. Over time, I become close to Jones. I accompany him to the execution chamber and comfort him as he is murdered. I leave the execution chamber with the same feelings that I do with all the others. I feel like I just killed someone.
When you’ve seen as many executions as I have, you realize that the real monsters amongst us are those who would strap someone down and murder them as they lay defenseless. Maybe Jim Jones would deserve such a death, but are we willing to become monsters to make it happen?
(Rev. Dr. Jeff Hood is a Baptist pastor, theologian and activist living and working in Arkansas. Dr. Hood’s extensive work has appeared in numerous media outlets, including in the Dallas Morning News, Huffington Post, Fort Worth Star Telegram, Atlanta Journal Constitution, Los Angeles Times, WIRED magazine and on ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, MSNBC, Fox News, and NPR. He writes regularly at https://www.patheos.com/blogs/jeffhood/. The collection of his articles for this site appears here. He can be reached at jeffrey.k.hood@gmail.com.)