Undated Letter to Jim Jones from Lillie Victor
EE-2-t
[Editor’s note: Spelling and grammatical errors corrected throughout.]
Dear Dad;
I want to tell you how I misused money that could have helped our poor oppressed people back in the States. I want to show to try to forget what time and age it is and even when I go to the movies I can still see how Blacks are put down and humiliated. I can see how much ignorance is being projected but I just wanted to get away from life. And at times I wanted to kill someone to kick down hostility. I went for too long walks at night, and work would keep me sometimes less hostile and many of times I thought I would never see you again. I may be young but to me I saw enough out of life to not want to live at all. Jonestown is a very wonderful place but I just am not happy with life, Dad, maybe I am being too self-centered so if I have to live it would be for the children. I would not like to see a good thing go to the worst side.
Dad I wonder they say that the Zodiac [Killer] is back in town. If Tim Stone [Stoen] was killed the same way those other people [unintelligible word] the same way we could still be accessory to murder with 2 or 3 other people killed like him, it would be hard to say that Peoples Temple killed Stone. Or am I being too naïve.
Lillie Victor
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Undated note to Jim Jones from Diane Wilkinson
EE-2-uv-1a
Dad,
I just wanted you to know that I wasn’t in no way upset about today I felt someone had given you the impression I just asked Ava [Jones] who was on the list and who was going to get the baby today. I understand that there is a lot of problems involved in these situations and I’m not pushing this and I think you for your concern for me when you’re so busy.
Thank you, Dad,
Diane Wilkinson
P.S. I realize your legal problem in this and I am patient about it.
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Undated thank you to Jim Jones from Leslie Wilson
EE-2-uv-2
Dearest Dad,
Thank you, thank you, thank you – and million thank you’s for saving my baby! You are always there. I’m sorry for you having to go through this crisis with Ricky [Johnson]. You are always so loving, always so good and honest. The greatest Marxist-Leninist. Every day I realize how much you & socialism are so important and so much a part of our lives. Thank you for allowing my child Jakari to live in the most beautiful place, a society here, no racism, no drugs. In the States Jakari woiuld’ve been seriously ill with a respiratory problem and dead no matter if he was breathing or not. The US is death anyway.
I Love You, Dad
Leslie Wilson
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Mary Wotherspoon reflection on Dick Tropp letter, June 1978
EE-2-uv-3a – 3b
Misc. thoughts
What I feel about Dick Tropp’s paper. (I wish I had more time to do this.) I feel I am too moody. I’m beginning to realize I can control my moods if I want to. I need to communicate with people more. I have to realize that this is my family, I’m going to build a world and die with them. I see elitism and use it to do what I want to. Guilt does not motivate me. I can’t look at the young people Peter [Wotherspoon] molested, I feel bad – guilty and I become more withdrawn.
Why should I have the right to eat when others are starving? When we are so far removed from suffering we forget it exists. I do forget, too easily. I’m not functioning to my capacity. I many times refused to take the responsibility of it. I do not deserve to live for the simple fact that I am white and I take privileges and do not feel as if I’m doing enough working in the fields. But what right do I have to even consider my feelings when our relatives and grandparents had to work long, long hours, die – forgotten in nursing homes, discriminated against because they spoke a different language & had different customs. I agree with the old Indian custom of going into the wilderness to die because one has lost his usefulness. I just wonder if I will still feel that way when I get to that point. This time I quit looking at the people and start listening to what is being said – when people talk. It is too easy to say things that demand character – too many people pay lip service to communism – not enough people do. I feel that you hate me & don’t trust me and that’s the way it is. It doesn’t really matter to me – I have always felt this way. Your character is too much for me to keep on my mind, so I choose to tuck it away a lot. I see everything you do is for the good of the whole. The means are irrelevant to me – what is important is the goal. I do not expect to live or see a better day. My mouth is taking food that a child who could one day be a socialist-communist could use. People of high character have suffered and died/are now suffering and dying. I wonder if I have the courage to take their place. Could I take someone else’s child and assume the guilt for them being in the world & give them the care they need?
I wish I had more time, to be honest. I need a lot more self-analysis.
Mary Wotherspoon
[Annotation on bottom of second page: “required paper on self-introspection”]
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Undated thank you to Jim Jones from Eddie Washington
[Editor’s note: Spelling and grammatical errors corrected throughout.]
EE-2-uv-4a – 4b
dear dad Just a little thank you note for all of your love and kindness and care for all of us. Thanks for the wonderful chicken dinner on yesterday and pork today. Very good dinner. Oh how I love all of the food but the chicken dinner was delicious. Dad I’m so happy here. I do want you to know I’m so glad you accepted me as one of your own children. It is so beautiful here. Oh how I love it. Thank you so very much for everything, especially our loving mother Marcie [Marceline Jones] who I adore. She is so wonderful to me. Thanks again, the least of your children.
Eddie Washington
—–
EE-2-uv-5a – 5b
1977 thank you to Jim Jones from Eddie Washington
[Editor’s note: Spelling and grammatical errors corrected throughout.]
Dear dad
Just a thank you note to tell you how much I thank you for your concern for each and every one of us. I am truly grateful for what you have done in saving the lives of all that [are] here and brought back to life and the most wonderful thing was you healed our dear sweet mother and brought her back to us. Dad I can’t express my feeling. I hope you understand I am so happy here. I hardly think of my so-called relations. Just write them to let them know I am still happy and alive. I love it here. Also this is our freedom home, you and your precious mother Renetta [Lynetta] Jones made it possible for all of us to be happy. Anyone that is not I am sorry for them. Thank you dad for all of your healing and concern for every one of us, the babies and mothers. Thank you for your concern of our weight, it has helped me very much. I don’t have too much to gripe about. Every time gripes come, I let [illegible word] overrule. Every time I think where I am from and you give the news, I feel more secure and glad I am here. Thank you for all the good food you are giving us to eat. It is delicious. All the chickens, pork and fish is wonderful that you provide so much for so many of us. Thank you again and again for your love and kindness for me and all although I feel the least of all.
Eddie Washington
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Undated letter of confession to Jim Jones from Joe Wilson
[Editor’s note: Spelling and grammatical errors corrected throughout.]
EE-2-uv-6a – 6b
To Dad;
I thought I should write you a full confessions of all my guilt. One thing is before meeting you I spent lots of money on dope, about $50 or $60 a day for almost two years. I feel like a big asshole for buying and selling the white man shit to black young people. Also now that I know about all of the money really went to keeping black and brown people all over the world in some kind of white power regime. I guess I just as well have killed and tortured poor whites & blacks and brown men, women and babies with my own hands. Even after being with you for as long as I have, I was, up until the day I came here, still helping the white man by running around in the streets drinking, smoking and spending money on hotel rooms, clothes and food I really didn’t need. Even though I didn’t pull the trigger of the gun that killed your son and my brother [Chris Lewis], I have to take some of the blame for it. Also your Mother [Lynetta Jones], I know at one time in my life I take enough time with myself with you that you could have spent with her and maybe she would still be here. Sometimes when I think of all this I could just end it all. But I know I never would or could because of Jakari [Wilson]. Plus working harder and keeping up with the news and stay out of trouble would be the only right and communistic way to deal with my guilt. I know I am long-overdue as far as taking part in leadership but I always have the feeling of being [unintelligible word] or hypocrite by telling anyone anything. But my biggest guilt is that I wanted a baby boy, never once stopping to think of the pains in life. I don’t want to leave here for any length of time. But I know I could sell us to people just as easy as I sold dope, and more proudly.
Thank you for being the best friend I never and will have.
Your son, Joe [Wilson]
—–
Undated request to Jim Jones from Peter Wotherspoon
[Editor’s note: FBI document uses this reference number twice.]
EE-2-uv-7a – 7b
(from Peter Wotherspoon)
Dear Dad,
When and if you feel it is suitable I would like to change my name. I’ve always hated the name “Peter” for all the pain and embarrassment it has brought me. I think of “Wotherspoon” as largely a family of Chilean fascists. It is also been a source of ridicule. I wish to use the name “John” because of people like Johnny Jones who I admire in his Socialist sensitivity and commitment. As a last name I would like the Aurucanean Indian name Chiloe (pronounced Chee-low-way). I don’t feel I deserve to take a name of Jones for certain, nor any other great Socialist leader. I will have to prove my commitment with what remains of my life in the opportunity of my death. If it is all right with you, I would like to be known as “John Chiloe” and to bury my old effective personality with my shitty name.
Thank you, Dad
—–
EE-2-uv-8a
1977 money-making proposal to Jim Jones from Barbara Walker
Father:
I would like to start writing children’s storybooks based on your life, from childhood up, but especially childhood for the preschoolers and elementary. The structure & love that they are getting couldn’t be bought, and I feel that should be able to grow up with their leader through books. I feel it’s very important that they identify with you before you became the leader, and let them know that your principle and character is not something that just developed overnight. I think reading that you would help them relate to you on more than one level – as was done with [Vladimir] Lenin through children’s storybooks. If you approve, I’m sure that Lynetta [Jones] has a lot of material. Although I can’t draw, I know that we have many people here who could assist through drawing illustrations, and later it could possibly turn out to be a money-making project.
Thank you Father
Barbara Walker
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EE-2-uv-8b
Note to Jim Jones from Barbara Walker on Father’s greatest pain
Father:
Since your greatest joy I feel is making us happy, and seeing that we are safe and secure from all of the pains that the capitalist society has brought us, your greatest pain is probably seeing us bring so many of our capitalist traits here, where they are used at our own convenience and for our benefit, consciously or unconsciously, to tear down or discredit what you have spent your lifetime advocating and building up.
I feel guilt, but oftentimes too late, that I am still so egotistical, and sometimes I don’t feel as though I’ve grown any. I have a habit of not wanting to face deal with my own feelings or guilt because I like to reserve a scapegoat for myself that can be rationalized, and if I can rationalize something I have done or want to do, I panic.
My worst problem and guilt is the way I’d like to believe I feel about people. My two main differences are “hate”, and “race”. Frankly, I don’t hate anybody here, because I couldn’t profess to believe in you, and hate your people. I don’t hate anybody and I’m not a racist, but I am afraid of people because I know nobody is for real. (I make it a point of not allowing people to care about me because I know I’ll have to choose between something I feel is right add a person or people, or end up caring about someone who won’t be there when I need them. The problem is I haven’t learned not to expect anything from anybody – Just give, and it seems so unfair. I guess that’s the reason I don’t want anybody giving me anything – not even friendship, then I can justify not having to give anything in return. I know this is a problem and I will try harder at seeing the best in the people. I say I dislike more often, I think of how I’m contributing to your pain and rejecting the people you love most.
Thank you Father
Barbara Walker
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Letter to Jim Jones from Bea Orsot, 11 September 1978
EE-2-uv-9b – 9c
[Editor’s notes: This document was typed in all capital letters.
[In context, and with the referenced note attached, “Mary” the writer as a codename for Bea Orsot.]
9-11-78
To: Jim
From: Mary
Re: The Shah
Enclosed is a note from him. I will give you the background.
He has been acting very alienated and what I consider to be strange. I wrote that up yesterday… that he had become a stranger to me. I cannot get through to him so yesterday, I wrote him a note saying that I felt rejected. I picked that word because he is turned on by it because he feels rejected all the time and inadequate. I was prompted to write the note particularly because I caught him looking at me yesterday in the food line when he did not know I was aware. It was a piercing look of hostility … very frightening … like he looks at you sometimes in People’s Rally. I knew I had to get through somehow but was lost as to how to even get started to get through to someone who obviously hates you.
I was not home during our half day off which is the time we sometimes spend about 1 hour together. He was at home for about 3-4 hours and I was working in the radio room. He came to stay and spend time there because he brought with him books to read and a flute to play but by the time I showed up, it was time to have dinner. I thought he might have been upset by that too.
Also I noticed he was very alienated last night Peoples Rally, got up and walked out, came back after the test was over. Now, I know for sure something was wrong. Whenever he withdraws like that, he is usually hostile. I thought he might even be thinking of leaving for the bush like he did before but I didn’t or could not write it up because I can’t prove a damn thing. A lot of my conclusions are based on feelings. His passport was on my mind yesterday in that connection, knowing that it has never been found. I started to look for it last night but decided to wait till tonight.
He once told me that whenever he gets negative, he withdraws, doesn’t want to talk to anyone … not even his brother [Richard Grubbs, a.k.a. Ken Norton]. (He told me this right after he took you on in front of radio room).
I just knew something was wrong but could not communicate. Scared to talk and scared not to talk. I was so concerned about it, I went to Penny [Kerns] yesterday to ask her to watch him also. Couldn’t put my finger on it. Stayed up till 3:00 AM trying to figure it out.
The attached note from him this morning proves that something is wrong, that he is hostile and rebellious, but it did open up and say that, which is rare. He never, never writes notes. This is the first one.
Inez [Wagner] just told me that he is also very frustrated about the school situation; no tables at all in the school this AM … all taken by displays; teachers not doing their lesson plans, school generally going to pot, and when it does go to pot he will be redeemed as a failure which he fears. Inez says he has just had it with tests (news) and so has everyone else. She says he laid the Russian on Margarita [Romano] and I can see why he did… It [He] probably considered it too much pressure yet he told me he would rather do that in meetings than just sit. He could have asked me to do what Margarita is doing. I could have done it just as well but that is neither here nor there right now and it’s fine if it remains like it is.
His note shows where his head is at and proves that my feelings were not unfounded. He must be watched carefully and treated sweetly. Of course, I will continue in the relationship with love and kisses.
I wish you would take care of yourself, Dad, and listen to others when they tell you that you must rest. I wish you would stop giving the news for a while. People aren’t even listening at certain times of the day. You have to stop it. You could hardly talk this morning … people aren’t listening Dad. Please stop it. The majority of folks get the news from the library. You have got to stop talking so much. The use of your voice just aggravate your situation and you never give your lungs a chance to heal.
Please, for our sake, stop, stop it! I know you will do it for your sake.
—–
EE-2-uv-9a
Referenced Note to Bea Orsot from Tom Grubbs
Written 9-10-78
Bea,
By way of explanation, I’m not angry or upset with you. I’m sorry you get the brunt of it when you are not the cause.
The cause is the same old cause – Too damn many meetings. I don’t want to drag anyone in all my rebellion, don’t see any alternatives that are acceptable, do not believe that talking can do any good, I just generally feel totally alienated from everyone when I get like this.
I know that I am not fair to you. If you desire to terminate this relationship (?), I will not protest. I don’t expect you to get caught up in my bum-trips.
Tom
—–
EE-2-uv-10
Letter to Jim Jones from Bea Orsot, 10 September 1978
[Editor’s notes: This document was typed in all capital letters.
[In context, and with the document’s writing style, “Mary” the writer as a codename for Bea Orsot.]
9-10-78
To: Jim
From: Mary
Re: The Shah [Tom Grubbs]
He has become a stranger to me in the situation is becoming more and more unbearable each day, yet I will bear it, but have to do it now, day by day, because forever it sounds too long. I do not know anyone like him. He seems to slowly be developing everything about himself into the dangerous personality. His entire physical appearance, especially his face, seems to be changing. It is not my imagination; I watch him closely and carefully. I really had not realized it so much until I recently saw a picture of him taken with the children when he first came – teaching the children – the picture that is in our pamphlet. He is not that person anymore; doesn’t act or nor does it look like it. That person was a warm, sensitive person. This person is a completely different person and very strange to me. I cannot even pretend any longer to relate to him. He knows it. I don’t know what to say anymore as it is difficult to talk to an ice cube. He says that he has some regrets about the relationship because he was under any illusion that he had something to give but realizes that he does not and cannot (will not). [Marginal note referenced here: “He often refers to his sexual inadequacy as well as inability to physically demonstrate his feelings which he says he has.”] I told him that I did not regret it because I was glad to be relieved of the illusion I was under – him having something to give. He did have it one time. It was high on my list of persons who had a rare, tender, sensitivity. The only way I would have known for sure that it was and is an illusion was to be on the inside looking out instead of outside looking in. There is no way I can analyze him completely. He is getting more and more complicated for my small mind.
Last night, he missed taking the test because he got up and left Peoples Rally. Don’t know why or where he went. I told him when he got back that we had had the test and you said, “No matter or high or low, if you didn’t take this test, you will have to take extra classes”. He did not respond at all, nor did he demonstrate any feeling on his face. He has become a poker face.
I rarely see him at all. We sleep at night, rarely anything else. When he gets up, I am asleep, don’t see him all day and then it is another night of sleep which goes on and on so I hope my analysis is not imbalanced since I only have a little time to reflect. I can only give you what and when I see whatever. This is a miserable place to be … to say the least. It is a painful frustration, having to hang on because I have to, yet I know that I must. Who will do it if I don’t? Sometimes I think he wants out as much as I do but I can’t encourage that either so it is one big pain. I do not let him know my feelings (emotionally). I told him that whenever I have ever let any man know my feelings emotionally, he always shits on them. Told me a short while back that he really never knows where I am at. I told him that I would never let him know either. He understood it having been in that realm of pain himself in the past. I could have deep feelings; I don’t, but I could. The icy situation will not allow me to. His ego will not allow me to either & this other personality surely won’t allow it.
I do think the day will come when he will flip out completely. He looks more and more insane, to me each day. I really fear him a great deal at times but I do not intend to let him know that. A very strange thing happened at Steering Committee recently. It sounds crazy and I wonder if my mind had not flipped when it occurred but it did occur. I was seated about 8 feet from the Shah. I did not even know that he was in the meeting because he had not been attending since Marcie [Marceline Jones] cleared him to be out because of pressure several months ago. Suddenly I realized that I was looking at a blank face … no features … just blank … a person without a face. I thought I had cracked up. Slowly the features took form, almost like a werewolf, and it was the Shah looking straight at me. It scared me shitless. I wanted to write it up then but thought you’d say I was insane and not him. Thought I’d better now. We both may be. The experience lasted only for about one second but it did happen – (in my mind I’m sure).
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Undated thank you note to Jim Jones from Michelle Wagner
EE-2-uv-11a – 11b
Dad:
I wanted to say thank you very much! Jonestown is beautiful. Today was the first good sleep I have had because of all the walking I’ve been doing. Can’t get enough! It’s definitely too good to be true.
Now want to wake up in the morning. You want to work. You can be yourself.
I could not say enough! But I will say that I shall not let you down ever again!
Thank you,
Michelle Wagner
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Undated letter to Jim Jones from Peter Wotherspoon
EE-2-uv-12a – 12b
Dear Dad,
No one has received more concern, love and mercy and deserved it less than myself. I feel guilty eating the food you have provided by sweat, blood, and suffering. I feel we eat much too good, knowing that you have worry and plan and struggle for every bit of food and other luxuries that you give us. I also know I would be healthier eating less.
I understand the principle involved giving Helen Snell your protein but I also recognize the danger it presents to your health and therefore the whole collective. Please allow me to give Helen my portion of protein. I know that I have enjoyed privilege and perhaps eaten when Helen Snell, because of being black, has had to go hungry before she came to this family. I don’t approve of Helen’s insensitivity to the sacrifice you have had to make to give us life, but I can understand an old black woman in her insecurity from suffering hunger and racism a good part of her life having a blind spot in this regard.
For the greater good of the Collective, please allow me to do this small token of my gratitude, and substitute my protein instead of your own. I know you live only for us, but please guard your health and continue your protein intake that I understand is vital during times of ill health.
Please do not mention this to anyone. It will be my privilege to make this small sacrifice.
Thank you Dad for all you’ve done, all you continue to do, the mercy and love you’ve extended to me. I will try to make up for letting you down in the past.
Thank you,
Peter Wotherspoon
—–
Two notes to Jim Jones from Jewell L. V. Wilson
EE-2-uv-13
[Editor’s note: The two pages of this document are in reverse order on the FBI PDF.]
13/10/78
Dad I am must say I am not taking Cridicilion as strong as I should, and I don’t give them as I should, but I am learn to except them more strongly each in every day.
Thank you, Dad
Jewell L. V. Wilson
To Dad
I, Jewell V. Wilson, thank you Father for saving Eyvonne Hayden & Denise Hunter life in [illegible word]. I shall never forget what you have done for me.
Jewell L. V. Wilson
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Thank note to Jim Jones from unknown person, September 1977
EE-2-W-1a – 1c
To Father 9-6-77
I thank you for bringing me and many other of us to this beautiful socialist country. We have escaped the cruelty of racism in the capitalist system. In the capitalist countries the Bakke decision keeps all blacks barred from schools such as Law, Dental, Medicine.
Senate Bill 1427 makes it possible for the police to put one in prison for life or gas chamber if you don’t tell him what he is thinking at the time.
The earthquakes that are coming will drop Los Angeles in the ocean and the tidal waves will be felt as far as Pittsburgh, PA.
Ethnic weapons is mass genocide a planned extermination of a national racial group. The three countries that wouldn’t sign was the USA, Union of South Africa, and Brazil.
Napeon [neutron] bomb will destroy every person of a minority group and not destroy buildings or vegetation.
China is the only country to prepare for protecting their people by building an underground city to escape the nuclear holocaust.
Concentration camps, cliometric theory would make minority groups slaves, because it states that all were slaves at first, and they were happy then, why not put them back. Congress passed the bill for capital punishment to effect those at the age of fourteen years of age.