[Editor’s notes: The letters on this page derive from several sources, principally FBI Section 126 • EE-1 • Letters to Dad (G-J); FBI Section 130 • EE-2 • Letters to Jim Jones; and FBI Sections 121-123 • BB-31 – BB-32 • Tim Stoen, D Touchette.
[Insofar as possible, these letters have been arranged in alphabetical order of the writer’s last name. Unless otherwise noted, the letters retain their original spelling and grammar.
[Peoples Temple member often used old reports and documents as scratch paper, using the reverse side of these pages for their letters. We have labeled and transcribed those scratch pages which include information about Jonestown.]
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Undated Note to Clifford Gieg from unknown Temple member
EE-2-f-14a – 14b
Clifford Gieg
Hi, Cliff;
How are you keeping? Bob told me, he was going into the interior and so I decided to write you. I thought I would have been able to see you when you came down the last time. I was at the Cultural Center, I saw you but I didn’t get to speak to you because you were on stage. I am finished with school and I am home while my examination’s results are out. When are you coming down. I really miss you a lot. I saw Mike but I didn’t get to speak with him. I am going to bed now and dream of you. Love yourself and I love you.
[Illegible signature]
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Thank You Note to Jim Jones from Irma Lee Gill, September 1978
EE-2-f-12a – 12b
[Editor’s note: The numerous spelling and grammatical errors in this note have been corrected.]
Sept 25/78
Dear Dad,
Thank you for healing me and my daughter of cancer & also mother when she had cancer in her lungs. Also saved Rick Johnson’s life. Also thank you for [illegible word] beautiful home. Andrew love and kindness thank you for what you are doing for everybody. I know you are the Christ & I [illegible word] your flesh so much for that. This is my suggestion: have people to pass out paper & a copy to go by to write letters in the meeting when we are altogether in that way everybody can write letters. That is the [way] we did is in SF. If 3 hundred in the Temple we wrote 3 hundred letters if needed to be. Also I suggest for quietness in the meeting have all young people sit in front & Sec. in back & see that if that will help the noise. Have all people to meditate twice a day. You was with this in SF but we [illegible word] the same when I was there [illegible word] at 6 AM at home when I got to work I meditated. Before I left work I meditated when I got home I meditated & meditated on the elevator 1029 I did the same thing not just for myself but for others. Police was beating up people. We could hear the [two illegible words]
[Second page, writing too faint and illegible]
Irma Lee Gill
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Reflection on Jim Jones’ Pain from Vern Gosney, May 1978
EE-2-f-7a – 7b
Verne Gosney
What I Think Dad’s Greatest Suffering Is
I think that Dad probably suffers the most from helping people and in their understanding of Socialism and have them turn around and shit on him. To constantly open up to people, to reach out to them and get no understanding or realization of Dad’s feelings as a human being.
Also Dad is always the brunt of People’s hostilities when he has always done the loving thing towards that person or persons.
Also the lack of thinking comrades do & our un-kindness & insensitivity to others. We are incredibly unkind to each other – ready to cut each other’s throat for the slightest offense. We are always yelling at each other too. I think this must grieve Dad because he is the Supreme example to us – and we should follow that example of kindness & love.
I know for myself I am trying to assume guilt for the many times I have heard Dad, & angered him severely by flaunting my rebellion & hostilities to his great teachings. Now each time I feel certain resistance in my mind to some of Dad’s teachings – I think of those things over & over again to realize why I feel this way & to change them & overcome those feelings because I know I have been very brainwashed by capitalist living & decadent thinking and it takes a while to reverse the process. Mainly whenever I examine myself I find that my resistance to any points of Dad’s teachings is a resistance to think – once I think about it I realize that I was trying to deceive myself so I could preserve a holdout of illusory thinking.
Thank you Dad.
My money-making idea is an herb shop to be in Georgetown selling all kinds of herbs for natural cures. This could be coordinated with experimental kitchen & herb committee.
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Undated Note to Jim Jones from Juanita Green
EE-2-f-13a – 13b
[Editor’s note: The numerous spelling and grammatical errors in this note have been corrected.]
Hi Dad
You asked all who had swelling in their legs and lots of us stood. I went to the nurses office but they didn’t have any of those cow foot leaves. So I went up behind the apartment, got some of the leaves, put them on my leg, kept on overnight, it drew all pulse [pus?] out and took all swelling out. I felt like I had a new leg. I thank you dad. I hope I didn’t do wrong. But it sure felt better. You so good to us dad, you opened so many doors for us we should be more grateful to you for everything.
Juanita Green
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Undated Self-Evaluation by Amondo Griffith
EE-2-f-3a – 3b
From Amondo G. [Griffith]
My self evaluation. I felt that when I first got to Georget[own] everything was going fine, no complaints, going out every day checking on charcoal. After that I started doing procurement. At first everything was going fine. I went out to Linden for three days, made about 600 dollars, came back feeling very good knowing that I did something. I was never too good and procurement but that three days in Linden showed me that I could do it. Got back to GT, made about 30 dollars about two or three days later. Started going down I felt defeated when people was not giving. I am sorry dad that I did good work in some things but bad in another that when my attitude came I felt bad about not making enough money but I kept it to myself. Hear the same every day about not making enough money. I blew up at Maria [Katsaris], but after I felt bad so I went back to her and we talked about it and got it straight. That the only time I gave a straight attitude.
Dad about giving mother [Marceline how jones] no respect. It’s not true, I don’t care what who say, it’s not when mother asks for something I did it. Feel I have a good attitude with mother.
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EE-2-f-4a
Reflection on Dick Tropp’s Letter from Pauline Groot
Letter to Jim Jones from Pauline Groot
Jim, about Dick Tropp’s letter, everything he said about himself applies to me except the willingness to be shot. If I was shopping my usefulness was up, I’d feel exploited, use, and mad.
How somebody can betray as a potential traitor, I know how but it’s hard to explain. The closest comparison is leprosy. A leper can cut his hand to the bone just by accident because the brain does not feel with the hand is going through. A traitor can hurt us, our anybody, because of not feeling for what others are going through. Call it moral leprosy. Debbie [Blakey] can do anything, and she will because she does not feel for anybody else.
Me, there’s no way I’d ever leave Johnstown of my own free will. I know too much about the cruelty of the USA. But if I was kidnapped and tortured, I’d talk. On a more immediate level, I’ve been daydreaming when I should have been studying. I don’t trust myself. The only way I act right is with structure around my ass. On the other hand, I’ve improved my behavior quite a bit since coming to Jonestown. If I grow fast enough, maybe I’ll grow to be able to take pain before it really comes down.
I used to assume that moral leprosy was the normal human condition – “each man his own prisoner, in solitary confinement for life.” – The psychologists call it anomie. I grew up among the atomic bomb scientists, and every single one had this quality. I guess that’s how they could make bombs. I thought that was just how people were. I still think that a lot of people have moral leprosy, completely, and a lot more have a case which is complete except for a few relatives or close friends. When you wonder how Debbie could endanger black people with her racist lies, I think you’re naïve; she doesn’t give a shit about a bunch of black strangers and never will. I wish you knew that, your strategy would be better. And if you knew and believed that people like Debbie are perfectly normal on this plane, you might be able to reassure her mother Lisa [Layton]. Debbie isn’t any worse than a lot of people in this movement; she just happened to get the one set of circumstances that would cause her to go. Or at least, Lisa might be better able to endure if she thought so.
I also think you make a tactical mistake, telling everybody you don’t understand people like Debbie. It contributes to people thinking they know more than you, they can get around you, changing the strategy you lay down, etc.
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EE-2-f-4b
You’d be better off asking somebody with an established record of paranoia to explain how people could be so evil. Jeff Carey is paranoid enough, and so am I. I’m going to start telling you what I think you’re being idealistic and naïve. Even if I’m wrong.
I think you’re naïve to imagine people will realize your goodness. It’s like a radio broadcast; no matter how loud and clear, people won’t pick it up unless they’re tuned to the same vibration. Communists might pick it up. To people who don’t understand communism, you’re going to appear as a devil come to destroy their world, or a confusing, frightening, unpredictable mixture of good and evil, or stupid or crazy, or some combination of those ideas. You need to know this when you plan strategy. You can reasonably hope the Communists will see you as another communist (maybe) and recognize you as good; if anybody else does, you should treat it as a pleasant surprise.
You got this far without being recognized as good I’m more than a fraction of Jonestown, so it must be possible to build without necessarily being recognized. As to what you actually are building on, it’s a sort of trade-off. It’s as unstable as building on sand. I know I’ve thought along these lines, and I suspect a lot of other people did too – “Well, this is a better situation than living outside in America, so I’ll do enough work and show enough obedience to stay in the group and keep out of trouble.” I believe this is the attitude of 9/10 of Jonestown. You should expect treason, not be so shocked and shook up by it. People with that attitude don’t have much loyalty to break, and it’s very easily broken.
This does not necessarily mean that all your work is in vain. For instance, I didn’t understand communism, I didn’t understand what the hell you were talking about until after I came here and saw it and lived it for a while. And I call myself smart. Others will probably be getting the message, one by one. Some will, and some won’t.
I think you were naïve not to recognize long ago that a lot of people are afraid of you, including many in Jonestown. You want tuned to fear, and you don’t pick up on it; but hate and fear are two sides of the same coin. Every time somebody hates you,
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EE-2-f-4c
and doesn’t come to you and talk it out, they are also afraid of you
People don’t remember your goodness, you’ve got to remember that. When you do something necessary like demanding work, people don’t just hate you, they’re afraid of you too. They don’t understand what you’re doing or why it’s necessary. What they do see is, you’re causing them trouble and inconvenience now, you are likely to cause more in the future, they can’t predict when or why: so they’re afraid.
When I tried to express this about myself personally, you thought I had gone crazy. I’m telling you now that I believe 9/10 of Jonestown is afraid of you and will continue to be afraid until they get a full understanding of communism, which may take years if it ever happens. If you don’t believe me, ask people to write up to you how much of they’re afraid of you. But have the doctor on hand before you read the answers, because the answers will break your heart.
People under a capitalist boss are usually much more afraid, and with much more reason. You haven’t caused the fear, capitalism caused it, you just kind of inherited the fear when you took the role of leader. People resent you because you look physically like a white person – right? You learned to live with that. This is another emotion that you get and don’t deserve. I also believe that if you recognize clearly that it exists you will be able to strategize around it, and have a much better chance of actually reaching people by knowing what is the obstacle in the way. If you think people aren’t afraid of you, just because you love them, you’re too naïve.
You are naïve when you told me, “People’s Temple will accept you.” To make a flat, blanket statement that way, it just isn’t so. You could have said, “People’s Temple is more accepting than anywhere else,” or “You’ll find more warmth, more friendship, and less hassling here than anywhere else,” or something like that. But there is no person completely accepted by everybody in Jonestown. It’s naïve to think there could be when we all grew up in capitalism, and I hope you won’t make a flat statement like that very often. I got my hopes up so high, and then when I ran into a bunch of hassling, I didn’t realize at that time you were to pure yourself to expect the
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EE-2-f-4d
evil that people do. I just thought you had lied. This sort of thing is not helpful. It upset me quite a bit and made me reluctant to talk things out with you. I wish you would quit it – the last time I noticed you were still speaking the same way. Peoples Temple is more accepting and less hateful than anywhere else in America, that much is true, and it should be enough.
You’re being naïve every time you tell women that they’ll be just as well accepted whether they get a guy or not. The leadership in Jonestown may feel that way, but some of the membership are still showing more respect to women who have a guy than women who don’t. You’d be better off to ask women for the names of the individuals who respect them more when they have a man. Then blast those individuals for encouraging every form of sex and treason we’ve ever had. There is less of that bullshit around Jonestown than anywhere else I’ve ever been. I feel more free to act in a “man’s job” here than anywhere else I know.
If you want evidence, ask Mother [Marceline Jones] or Eva how many people showed less respect to Eva after she and Johnny Jones broke up. We’ve come a long way, but the job is not yet done.
You were naïve when you consider letting our enemies have you so they’d leave us in peace. They already can’t stand their consciences; with you dead, by their hands, do you think they’d suddenly be able to live at peace with themselves? Hell no! They’d attack Jonestown with more fury than ever. As a daughter of a living father, I’m amazed at your love; as a follower of a battle commander in time of class war, I am appalled that you are so naïve.
Another thing you haven’t considered is how many people would become class enemies if you die for John [Victor Stoen]. People who don’t have enough guts to die with you, but can’t live with themselves afterwards, would be class enemies as evil as Tim Stoen, located in Guyana and in our ranks. This sort of thing will happen, much more strongly, if you give yourself up to the enemy. The only way to get the enemy off our backs is to win the fucking war
I offer one more thought to how you predict Debbie – anything that nearly killed us in the past, she is going to try again. No matter how vile. I hope she’s not smart enough to plan into new ideas of her own.
Pauline Groot
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Undated Memo to Jim Jones from Pauline Groot
EE-2-f-10a – 10b
Dad,
If we go to Cuba, I am not worried so much about the Cuban gov’t refusing to let in our people who are now in America, I’m worried much more about the American gov’t refusing to let them out.
For instance, Marie [likely Marie Lawrence] and her 8 foster children. She’d probably have to try to sneak out; she’d never get papers to take foster children to Cuba.
There‘d be others. How much trouble, how much danger to try to sneak them out? Could it even be done? In all cases?
If you’re dead, it probably won’t be done successfully.
Also we have some members back there who would be willing to follow you to Guyana – Promised Land – but not to communist Cuba. What’s worse, they’d cover their own faithlessness by saying you betrayed them by turning Communist. (I don’t know, maybe I’m too paranoid.) I don’t know how important you consider this.
Pauline Groot
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Undated Memo to Jim Jones from Tom Grubbs
EE-2-f-5b
[Editor’s note: The numerous spelling and grammatical errors in this note have been corrected.]
[Handwritten notation at top of page: “This is not necessarily important – no rush. Tom Grubbs”]
To: Dad
From: Tom Grubbs
Re: Thoughts about Ricky Johnson
The incident of Ricky Johnson has been the stimulus for a lot of thought for me. As result I see some things I did not formerly see, see some things different than I formerly saw them, and have organized some formerly disorganized thoughts.
First, I am very sorry then I made the scene that I made about 1 1/2 months ago when I made a lot of rash and selfish statements. I am also sorry that I had seriously considered deserting. I really did not believe that you care as much and as deeply as you evidenced yesterday. I listened very closely to all of your remarks over the PA and analyzed your intent and methods. I believe that you really do care deeply.
Regarding Ricky Johnson
First, I believe that sex is important and is a fundamental motivator or drive in most people’s lives. However, I do not believe that it is necessarily the most important. Instead, I believe more like Jung that the primal drive is to be secure and accepted by significant others as being of value to them. In my case, and in other cases that I have closely observed, I found that sex drive very closely with the person’s feelings about this acceptance.
In the mixed-up mind of the emotionally disturbed person suffering from feelings of inadequacy, insufficiency, inferiority, in failure the person has strongly ambivalent feelings – a strong need for affirmation that he/she it is unequivocally accepted and that acceptance must be demonstrated intimately, physically and continually. The reasons for this are that the emotional state is the primal or first state of awareness of the young child. It is linked with the period of life when the child had little command of language and thus when the person regresses or reverts to that emotional level he/she may well regress to the level when they did not have the command of language and thus have difficulty verbalizing. Much research indicates that when people relive sequences of a traumatic nature that occurred before ability to verbalize, they are subject to the same limits on expression that they had then. This may account for why people often do not want to talk about it – they feel that they cannot translate accurately their feelings. I believe this is largely true of Ricky.
As his teacher for about 4 months I noticed many things: he has a very poor educational background, feels dumb, stupid, inadequate and tries to cover these feelings in several ways. He plays the clown, the wise guy, the funny guy as a cover. No one expects a clown
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EE-2-f-5c
to be serious – it is not part of the role. But, people don’t think that while the clown makes everyone else laugh, he may be crying inside. He doesn’t do it because he really wants to, he has to, it is part of the role. To be accepted he must play the role. But the bind remains that people are too busy enjoying the clown to understand him.
But, that too is part of both the cause and effect. The clown is afraid to let people too close, they might see behind the mask – we might see all if the fears, the anxieties, the inadequacies that are common to all but not perceived as common to all. So now we are coming round-circle.
As a teenager I really wanted to be a clown. I watched all of the clown types around me. I watched many of them and I watched them close. I discovered that most of them felt more like crying than laughing most of the time. Indeed they prostituted themselves, sacrificed their last vestige of self-respect for approval and acceptance. (I am knowingly over dramatizing for emphasis). I have seen Vincent Lopez indoor all manner of degradation and humiliation for the laugh that he interpreted as acceptance. I believe that I have seen this to some extent from Ricky also.
His hip-jive talk is compensation for his lack of education. But who analyzes it as such – it is just part of his personality expression, right – wrong. But, who expects the clown and hip-cat to sp[eak the “Kings” English. It is not part of his “script.”
So he started out to be a clown to hide his inadequacies, fears, insecurities, real or imagined and got “boxed in”. People tend to hold him in that role and he is afraid to get out because at least he knows this “script” and how to manipulate the interpersonal relationships – accept in the area of meaningful communications.
I am suggesting that Ricky has a very low or poor image of himself. The rejection of his mom in her “cutting him down” and “tearing him up” verbally that was referred to in the meeting has made him super sensitive to rejection. This becomes one of the basics of the Don Juan complex: can’t stay too long with any one woman because she will find him out… see through or behind his mask … see him as he sees himself and reject him. So the Don Juan rejects to preclude rejection, a protective device, but it makes impossible the kind of relationship that is fulfilling. People who are afraid of rejection are afraid to give too much, to invest too much because the hurt seems to be proportional to the investment. If much is given or invested and the rejection still occurs, the other party must have seen somehow all of or some of the faults that were hidden. (I am sorry I am having such a hard time expressing this, I can feel it can identify with it clearly, but I am having a hell of a time expressing it.) Everything seems so relating to everything else then I just can’t seem to express it linearly.)
Considering how I believe Ricky views himself intellectually, educationally, mentally, and emotionally, it seems reasonable that he would emphasize his physique as he believes
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EE-2-f-5d
it to be his best feature. But, his physique and sex become confused. If he parades his best feature he is being sexy or is selling himself as a sexy person. But, at some point he will be called to “put up, or shut up”. I believe that the impotence that Cindy spoke of bothers him a great deal because he sees it not as a manifestation of his anxiety, but emphasis that he is TOTALLY IMPOTENT, and all areas. But, the person who believes he has very little of merit also believes he can not afford to give up what little he believes he has. The less one believes he has, the last he can afford to give up. (This is from the non-socialist perspective).
Generalization
In some of the areas I wrote of I believe all non-socialist/communists are described. I believe that ego can not be taken away from anyone, and it cannot be suppressed without consequences, unless it is sacrificed by the person himself. Unfortunately the sickly, poorly formed and twisted egos are the most troublesome. They are also the ones that the person can not afford to give up. A person will only willing integrate his ego [word crossed out: “willingly”] when it becomes healthy, when he feels he has enough positive attributes that he can afford, to integrate. The situation is not hopeless, but I believe that they need to be encouraged, valued, given opportunities to discovertheir value for themselves as a major part of the therapy. I believe that people do not believe that anyone can regard them more highly then they regard themselves for long.
The other alternatives that works sometimes, but not reliably is for persons to develop concern or empathy for others even less fortunate are perceived to be less fortunate. [Interlinear insertion: “very poorly stated. Does not communicate my thoughts.”] However, the beginning stages are safer if they are vicarious and the personal relationship is not intimate.
Unfortunately I see education or the lack of it as deeply involved in the view most people (particularly young people) have about themselves. I have watched Keith and Stanley Wright, David Goodwin, Vincent Touchette [could be Vincent Lopez], Jerry Wilson (Baisey), Marcus Anderson, Ronnie Dennis, Garnette [Garnet] Johnson as some of the youth that have received so much failure feedback from their educational misadventures that it has seriously eroded their sense of value with the result that they develop a mask or cover. They get cast in some superficial role such as the clown, the tough, the daredevil, etc. In twelve years of teaching I have seen a lot of this and feel very responsible to detect, prevent and correct these problems.
For most youth, I feel that the best therapy is to provide good education with REAL value and REAL* POSITIVE feedback to serve as the foundation for a healthy sense of value. [Note at bottom of page for asterisk: “as opposed to symbolic word/phrase feedback. They need something they can evaluate and value.]” (Many of our youth do not aspire to leadership or responsibility because they believe they do not have the skills that the task will demand, and they cannot fulfill the requirements that they will fail, will be rebuked for failure or ridiculed)
However, I believe that some of the youth that will not be reached by education need some counseling that DEMONSTRATES that people do understand them. Not admonitions and advice, but helping the person express how he/she feels, therapist making inferences [two lines bracketed come up with note “good, mature”]
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EE-2-f-5e
“guessing” how the person feels about situations that concern the person. Sometimes the thing that most impresses a person being counseled is when the therapist or counselor can verbalize how the counselee feels better that he can do for himself. Most people do not and can not really believe that someone else really loves or cares unless first they know that they are REALLY UNDERSTOOD. Most counselors want too much to give advice. They would do much better to start if they would demonstrate concern and interest first by listening and feeding back, providing the counselee a belief that he is understood and still accepted. “I have doubt that you really accept me so long as I have a deep dark secret that I am afraid to let you know about, but am afraid he will find out and reject me for”. Also, I believe we need some small group counseling so that youth can find that they are not really not different or “worse” than others, they just see and know their faults better.
I will quit. This was not meant to be pedantic. I do not mean to assume I am able to teach or lecture. I can’t seem to be brief. The more I think the more things seem related to other things and I can’t represent a spider’s web as a straight line of print. So I will stop. This may be just a gross waste of your time anyway. I’m not even sure that I did what I started out to do.
Note: Peter Wotherspoon was told in a meeting in Dr. Schacht’s office nearly a year ago that he could talk to me when he feels he needs someone to talk to. Before proceeding I desire to know if that is still acceptable or agreeable to you. Please respond to this question. [Last sentence circled, with marginal note: “Dad said ok.”]
Tom Grubbs
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Undated Memo to Jim Jones from Tom Grubbs
EE-2-f-11a
To: Dad, Mom [Marceline Jones], Phyllis Bloom [Chaikin], Judy Ijames
From: Tom Grubbs
Re: Therapy Report
David Chaikin, Report on Vision
About 3 weeks ago I was asked by Mother to examine David’s eyes and evaluate his visual problems. I did so and am able to report the following.
David has hypophoria of the left eye characterized by approximately 4″ inclination above horizontal when right (master) eye is at rest focused straightforward. The visual effect is quite similar to looking in a cracked mirror in which one part is out of plane alignment with the other. Maintaining binocular fusion required more than usual effort and became more difficult when he was tired, tense (under stress) or bored.
Near point focus was not possible closer than 12″ at which point the image became double.
David had noticeable inefficiency of ocular muscle coordination and control. It was not possible for him to make smooth, fluid sweeping movements across any plane. Instead, his movements were jerky and erratic. When reading, he over-moved his eyes frequently and established the new fixation too far to the right necessitating a regression to locate his proper place. This problem was observed at a rate of once in four lines, enough to disturb continuity and comprehension.
David’s most frustrating problem occurred on his return-left sweep to begin a new line. Frequently his sleep did not drop to the next line. As a result, he re-read most of the same line before recognizing his error. At times he made as many as three attempts before locating the new line which was sometimes done with the aid of his finger. I was able to study this problem with the aid of a mirror while he was reading. I found that it occurred an average of twice a paragraph and near the middle of the paragraph. Again the result was a disturbance in continuity and comprehension and an increase in frustration. The frustration and tension in turn promoted temporary myopia (nearsightedness, a common result of tension).
His eyes at right or left extreme tremored noticeably and the eye opposite the direction of extreme was prone to break-away or dart under the strain after about 4 seconds.
David exhibited a very slow visual recognition as measured by a tachistoscope. When therapy began his accuracy rate for recognition of 3 digit numbers at 1/2 second was an average of 77%.
APPRAISAL NOW
After 3 weeks of visual therapy I am pleased to report the following:
David’s pursuit tracking behavior is much more fluid and free. There is seldom a continuation after the target is stopped. He can accurately track complicated patterns at moderate speeds (movements requiring coordination of all 6 ocular muscles).
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EE-2-f-11b
His eyes will hold a position of extreme side vision with noticeable tremor only after 12-15 seconds, free of erratic eye darting.
He can maintain binocular fusion at near-point focus as close as 7″ an improvement of 5 inches, a significantimprovement.
His visual recognition speed has approved from 77% accuracy at 1/2 second to 93% accuracy at 1/100 of a second recognizing 4 digit numbers.
He has increased breadth of visual field so as to identify 2 digits separated by 14 spaces separation at a rate of 1/00 sec. with better than 90% accuracy.
He is able to solve maze puzzles by eye tracking without reference from a finger, line or pencil. Is speed and accuracy has improved though I will not have any statistical information for several days as I just today began timing him with a stopwatch.
REMARKS:
I am confident that through visual therapy daily can achieve better-than-average visual tracking and perception skills without the prismatic since the ophthalmologist prescribed for his hyperphoria.
However, the real testimony of progress is David himself. He can tell the improvement and is inspired to continue. He is an eager subject.
I desire to continue the study of ophthalmology. I recently studied a very good book which projected that all refractive visual problems can be corrected through therapy. I have been applying the concepts outlined in the book and am pleased with the results I am having correcting my myopic astigmatism. I am encouraged that it may well offer a very real alternative to the expense of eyeglasses, which at best are not as good as natural vision.
I am also studying the book, Major Audiometric Measurements. I believe that we can do more than diagnose hearing problems. I believe that with therapy many non-neurosensory problems can be at least partly remediated. I have already proven beyond any doubt (to myself) that listening skills can be taught-learned and can compensate for hearing deficiencies which cannot be remediated without hearing aids.
However, I am having a very difficult time finding enough time to study.
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EE-2-uv-9a
Note to Bea Orsot from Tom Grubbs
Written 9-10-78
Bea,
By way of explanation, I’m not angry or upset with you. I’m sorry you get the brunt of it when you are not the cause.
The cause is the same old cause – Too damn many meetings. I don’t want to drag anyone in all my rebellion, don’t see any alternatives that are acceptable, do not believe that talking can do any good, I just generally feel totally alienated from everyone when I get like this.
I know that I am not fair to you. If you desire to terminate this relationship (?), I will not protest. I don’t expect you to get caught up in my bum-trips.
Tom
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Undated Note to Jim Jones from Jann Gurvich
EE-2-f-1a – 1b
To Jim
Fr: Jann G. [Gurvich]
I want to sincerely apologize for the class tonight. I tried to do what you told me, show your leadership and revolutionary work. The class was structured in this way. I showed 4 common failures of revolutionary leaders: not having tight control of the military, nationalism, lack of familiarity with the people, in the problem of anti-authoritarianism (which I took from an essay of Engels). From this we discussed leadership and what was required of us as followers. The material was poorly presented and the main problem was that I was not really into it – I lacked commitment and understanding to give this topic a really powerful and effective presentation. This reflects on my low level of socialist consciousness and I really have to look at myself. The fact that I can discuss Marxism and politics but cannot adequately discuss you the leader shows elitism and intellectual detachment which is characteristic of a bourgeois intellectual. Again, I apologize. When I present this to the ones who did not hear it tonight, I will really think it through.
Thank you for all the encouragement you give me though I do not deserve it. Also, I want to let you know that I intend to go back to the fields as soon as I can arrange a part-time teaching schedule with the junior high.
Again, I apologize.
Jann Gurvich
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